caitlin's life lessons.

So I haven’t been feeling very happy lately. I’ve been in a sort of social and emotional funk, and I keep trying to pinpoint why. I’ve got it down to a couple things. Of course there are many factors that can contribute to a person’s unhappiness, but these are just some I’d like to address that I’ve noticed in myself. Hopefully they could help you to feel more happy as well :)

(Keep in mind that this list isn’t complete, it’s an ongoing thing that I occasionally add to. yeah yeah yeah.)

(I also hope they don’t come off as super cliché or cheesy, but if they do, I apologize. These are just things I’ve come to realize while living my life and I’d like to share them with you.)

-Caitlin’s life lessons-

1. Accept yourself.

Accept yourself for who you are rather than always trying to change and be like someone else. The sooner you accept yourself, the sooner you will feel inner conflict go away. It makes for much more peaceful living.

This one is especially applicable to my life. Not a day goes by where I don’t compare myself to other people, mostly other girls. I feel like I never measure up. Everyone is prettier, funnier, skinnier, nicer, smarter, more talented, etc etc etc. The list really does just go on and on. It’s incredibly disheartening and there’s no way out of it unless you just stop. Stop comparing and accept yourself. You’re beautiful just the way you are, it’s true! It’s like that sort of terrible but actually kind of good Bruno Mars song. You’re amazing just the way you are. Believe it. It’s true. No one expects you to be anything but yourself. Stop thinking negative thoughts, stop thinking you’re not good enough. You’re good enough. Now go live.

2. Don’t let the bad days make you forget about the good days.

I feel like this one is especially applicable to my life as well, haha. As mentioned earlier, I just get in these funks that I believe I won’t get out of. Things just suck, you know? I’m not doing well in school, I’m behind in my schoolwork, I’m tired, I feel ugly, I don’t feel like I have friends, I don’t feel like I have interesting things to say, I’m boring boring boring and again, the list goes on for miles. And the only remedy for this is to just keep trucking along. Things WILL get better. Life is a roller coaster, mainly emotionally but in other ways too. You will have the best of the best days, and then you will have the worst of the worst why I am even here I hate everything days. And then every shade of day in between. Sometimes you’ll be on fire socially; you’ll be talking and involved and you’ll have things to say and you’ll be a part of the group. Other times you’ll be awkward and have shifty eyes and just want to go hide in a hole away from people. It’s all part of life. You’ve got to have the bad days to appreciate the good days. Cheesy, but true.

3. Believe in yourself.

This one goes along hand in hand with “Accept yourself.” My main stiff with this one is, if you don’t believe in yourself, then who will? God will, for sure, and probably your mom and family, but if you don’t believe in yourself, the list of people who do gets very thin. You’ve gotta believe. Believe that you are beautiful and smart and fun to be around, and then you will start being beautiful and smart and fun to be around. People can tell when you are feeling good about yourself and when you’re feeling confident. People like being around confident people, because it makes them feel better about themselves. And then the feeling is reciprocated to the confident person and then we’re all just happy and confident and friendly and it’s really just nice. So basic rule of thumb: Believe. Even when the circumstances suck and you feel like you suck and no one would ever like you: believe. Cast all doubt aside and believe.

4. Be chill.

This is one that I feel really applies to me, and maybe not so much to other people. I feel like it’s a core part of my personality to just be that calm, chill person who contributes, but isn’t too loud, and who is there, but doesn’t always have to be the center of attention. I like to be involved, but I don’t have to be all up in anybody’s face about it. Sometimes I struggle with this, because I feel like I need to be more outgoing and involved, but most of the time I’m ok with it. I guess more input about this one is to just stop worrying about things. Worrying does absolutely no good in helping you accomplish things. It just makes you more stressed out and feel worse and more overwhelmed about everything you have to do. Trust me, I do this literally every day. So just take a deep breath and write everything down you need to do. Even if you don’t get it all done, at least it’s written down. Talk it out. Talk your problems and emotions out, either to a friend, a counselor, a parent, or just to yourself in your room. Organize your thoughts. Chill out. It’ll be fine.

5. Keep calm & carry on.

This is kind of the end-all one that encompasses all the others. It’s more like an “endure to the end” type piece of advice that I will close this blog post with. I mean, it seems really cliché as well, ‘cause we’ve all heard it a thousand times, but it’s good, right? It’s true and good and it works. When you’re stressed out ‘cause you have a huge paper due the next day, keep calm & carry on. Push through it. Don’t let yourself get distracted and just do it. When you’re nervous because you have to perform or present in front of tons of people and you’re freaking out and ahhhh there’s no way you can do it, keep calm & carry on. Breathe and remember what you prepared and you’ll be fine. Worrying and freaking out and despairing does absolutely nothing. Keep your head when things seem to be going wrong.

So yeah, those are my life lessons. You can take them or leave them. I think they’re pretty good, but then again, I wrote them. Haha.

For a closing statement I’d like to quote my good friend Bekah. She always tells me to “breathe & believe.” And it really is excellent advice if you think about it. Breathe & believe y’all. You got this.

don't you worry, you'll soon be on the mend
that's no trick, that flicker of radiance
you'll feel lucky darlin', I promise you this
you'll figure it out, and get good again

-vanessa carlton